November is the month for giving thanks. When I used to Facebook, I posted one thing every day in November, that I was thankful for. That was a good practice for me for one month, once a year. But my sense of gratitude ended shortly after I stopped focusing on my life through "Gratitude" lenses.
Last year in our efforts to cultivate gratitude, our family started a practice of sharing with each other, one thing that we are thankful for, every day at dinner.
We wrote them in a book and drew pictures or glued a photo to make it a keepsake. After about a month, our gratitude practice ended. We stopped when things got busy, not because we didn't have time, but because we didn't think about it. So we're giving it another shot this year. Like any other trait we want to acquire, we need to keep practicing gratitude.
It's easy to be grateful for the things that make us happy. But when we make an effort to be grateful in the middle of our trials, we find joy, which by definition is greater than happiness, because it lasts beyond our circumstances. It is true, a grateful heart is a happy heart. I know that for a fact.
BUT let me clarify here... When you are in the middle of trauma that is caused by unfortunate circumstances in your life, pain is deep ~ naturally! It won't be fixed by cultivating happy thoughts and that should not be expected by anyone. It's not bad or weak or broken, if you can't feel gratitude during those times. But I testify to you, that Christ will lift you when you turn to Him during those heavy times. I will show you how that works in a minute. Gratitude invites the Spirit and creates joy. I have a testimony of that.
In 1 Peter:1:7, Peter taught; "That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honor and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ." I feel the Savior closest to me during the most difficult times of my life. I find strength and light, comfort, growth, healing and peace through Christ. The peace that only Christ has to offer. He wants me to know that He is there and He shows me that through His tender mercies every day, sometimes several times a day. He also wants me to notice and remember the blessings of my trials. For that and other things that I am learning, I am extremely thankful!
The law of opposition does its finest work in our toughest trials, when we look to Christ for support. I learned the value of feeling drained emotionally, when I felt passion the very next day. I learned that in order for me to experience and appreciate beauty, I needed to experience ugliness. I need to feel insecurities, to know what genuine self-love and confidence feels like. I need to experience "humanness" and "life" to feel empathy and connection with others. And I need to truly repent to know true forgiveness. I know about the law of opposition; I learn these things from the scriptures. But it wasn't until I started experiencing opposition myself on a regular basis, that I really started to get it! "I must go through the valley to stand upon the Mountain of God", like that song says that is sung by The Christian band, Third Day.
Christ went through trials of loss, anger, abandonment, temptations, sadness and heartache to gain empathy for me. He stayed faithful to His Father's will through all of it. He is our best example of Gratitude! Job is also a good example, he praised God in his blessings and his trials. And as we know, he had plenty of trials! I also love the example of Nephi in the Book of Mormon. In 2nd Nephi, Chapter 4, Nephi acknowledged his trials. His father ~ his best friend in life ~ just died and members of his family were blaming him for their afflictions, some were even threatening his life. In the middle of his "humanness", his sadness and fears and frustrations, he turned his heart (like a super power) to delighting in the things of God.
In verse 17, he says; "Nevertheless, notwithstanding the great goodness of the Lord, in showing me his great and marvelous works, my heart exclaimeth; O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities." I believe that he is referring to his lack of faith or ingratitude as iniquities. I can tell myself this, like Nephi is telling himself... 28 "Awake, my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul." <--(Satan)
Read 2 Nephi chapter 4 to learn more about what a super-power like faith is from someone who has a grateful heart. He said in vs. 34 "O Lord, I have trusted in thee and I will trust in thee forever, I will not put my trust in the arm of flesh.. 35 I will lift up my voice unto thee; yea, I will cry unto thee, my God, the rock of my righteousness. Behold my voice shall forever ascend unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God."
Gratitude fasts are a good way to develop abilities that we need that are beyond our natural "human" abilities. Gratitude is being thankful before the blessings come, because you know that God WILL deliver. Instead of asking God for what you need or want, you thank Him for what he has already done for you; for always taking care of your needs and the needs of your loved ones. By doing this, you leave everything in God's hands and you can relax about needing to have control with the outcome. It is that faith that brings miracles.
One year before our daughter was born, my husband and I flew across the country to adopt a baby girl. A baby that we considered to be ours for 7 months. The baby that we named and spent thousands of dollars on in Social Work and Attorney fees and travel expenses. The one that had a birth mom that we grew close to, that we called Baby Mama and a birth dad that we called Baby Daddy (among other names that weren't quite as friendly). When the day came for us to take "our baby" home, Baby Daddy changed our plans. He refused to sign the papers to relinquish his rights, leaving mom with no other choice but to keep their baby.
I am thankful that God didn't listen to us in our broken hearts, begging and pleading with Him; "We'll do ANYTHING to have this baby! Soften Baby Daddy's heart, WHATEVER IT TAKES! Give Baby Mamma courage to do the RIGHT thing!"
This trial brought us closer together as a couple and closer to God. It showed us who our true friends are, it brought us closer to many of you, and it brought us our daughter who we adore more than life itself. Our daughter's birth mom watched us go through that trial. If we hadn't gone through that trial the way that we did, she may have turned to an adoption agency, instead of us to find a family for her baby, an agency with whom we were not associated.
God knows what He is doing, of that I testify to you. I am thankful to God for His Restored Gospel; for the strength and peace and knowledge that it provides, for the Principles and Priesthood Ordinances that provide us with hope and security and power and miracles! I stand as a witness of His miracles and tender mercies. I am thankful for every relationship that I have, especially the more difficult ones that help me to grow.
I am thankful for my health and the health of my family members, and our illnesses that cause us to depend on our loving and nurturing Father in Heaven. I am thankful for my husband's business and his talents and ambition in providing for our temporal needs and those times when we struggle financially, because of the miracles that we witness in our times of need. And for my husband and our adorable daughter who provide the perfect combination of joy and fun and struggles that all work together to make my life beautiful and fulfilling!
And more than any other blessing that I have, I am thankful for the knowledge and power that I am given because of Christ's Atonement. He suffered and died for ME! I am thankful for life's toughest moments, the refining fires that I need to make my life, with everything and everyone in it, more precious than gold!
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